What happened to Weezer?

It really is the perennial question isn’t it?

Hell, I remember in high school when the green album came out…the discourse around that time was about bands selling out. The phrase, “Rancid was awesome before they sold out” was commonplace. So, when the green album hit, and it wasn’t forward movement in that indie nerd rock sound…people got pissed.

Thats the main energy I remember, just pissed. Like what the fuck is this.

To be honest, green album is where I fall out. I own the first two….everyone in my generation who was my kind of people owned the first two. And, I did/do in fact own the green album. But then after that…i just stopped paying attention. It wasn’t for me anymore, and I tuned out.

So I was only like giving the cursory level of attention when Make Believe came out and shit exploded.


And that was true up until today. Due to The Great Album Project, I have now heard the entire creative output of the band.

So, I am going to take my turn beating this dead horse and give some observations on what the hell happened.


1. Rivers isn’t going to tell you anything about him anymore.

This feels like an easy one. Rivers (in his opinion) got really personal once, and it didn’t do well. Sure, Pinkerton is a cult classic, and people still worship at its altar to this day.

But, thats not what he wants. He wanted to be Kiss. Though, the motherfucker can’t write a Love Gun or Ladies’ Room to save his fucking life. Though he keeps trying (see above).

After Pinkerton, he has decided to shut the world out. And so his songs now operate at a clinical distance to where his natural talents get him to a place to get a passing grade. But he has nothing interesting to say. Nothing compelling.

It’s completely putting the car in neutral and let it coast.


2. The band has accepted mediocrity and laziness as an oeuvre

If the lyricism is on autopilot, the craft is straight up comatose.

They have no ability to come up with any kind of interesting riffwork, melody, or hell jams. Thats all they want right? The Summer Jamz of that particular year.

Well, they don’t have it in them to do it. Straight up dont want to put in the effort or the work.

Or at least thats what it feels like when you listen to it. They will hit you with an idea from time to time, and you may go “oh that is something…” but it is quickly buried in a tidal wave of mediocrity and shame.

In fact, lets talk about that…


3. It’s fuckin embarrassing

Every single weezer album once you get past pinkerton has at least one song (or plenty more) that you go, “What the hell is that?”

Some sort of either weird songwriting choice or attempt to connect to the youth that just straight up doesn’t work. I cant tell if Rivers & co are trying to tap into some of that early shit energy and they forgot how to write like a horny teenager or what the fuck it was.

Fuckin Jim Steinman never forgot how to hit his stride, all the way to the end. Somehow…someway, every single solitary attempt to stretch out leads to some shit where its just pure shame uncut in your veins.


4. The scent of hit desperation

This is a band DESPERATE to be on top of the world. Sure they got their NASCAR-brand-loyal fanbase, who will go on the cruises, and try to play Blast Off on stage with the band.

But that isn’t want they want. They want a hit. They want popularity.

And the hits, don’t work for me. They just don’t. I can totally see what they are going for. The wavelength they are trying to connect to. I just don’t buy it. If I want either 2010s style sad bastard slow rock or chill sun vibes, I’m going to somewhere else. Anywhere else. Definitely not coming to the great flying W.


I’ll keep it simple. Weezer is always going to have a special place in my heart. That era…truthfully Ill even throw in chunks of the green album. That is a soundtrack that is priceless. Its worth all the shame and misfiring of music.

It’s worth it to have what we did get out of them.

Now, do they have a true turn around. Another masterpiece up their sleeves someday? I doubt it, but you never know. Maybe they sneak in a late stage record to surprise.

For now, I come out of the discography with the knowledge I had going in. Thank god for Blue and Pinkerton. Cause there is nothing but shame all the way down.

© Church of the Holy Flava 2016 - 2021