The Lonely Island – Top 5

A request from the email box.

This shouldn’t really be a surprise. I got into The Lonely Island right at the same time SNL scooped them up. Then I followed everything from there. Didn’t like ALL of it. But, for a show that is sometimes only 30% good shit, seeing that SNL Digital Short logo pop up was a breath of fresh air.

But, for this list, we are going to focus on the songs. And, I don’t know if it is my mental state these days or just how I feel about The Lonely Island, but my reasoning is going to be all over the place. No consistent criteria to this top 5. In other words, Ill explain why I put it there, but don’t look for consistency between these five. That said, lets get into it.

Title track from their second album. This is here almost entirely on the pure power of stupid. Like how fucking far can we push the concept of making fun of the fact that there is a cottage industry of mediocre rap about having chains and liquor.

I think my favorite part is the anticipation. Your waiting for it to be literally any other content other than wearing a thin chain, thicc turtleneck, and light beer. Nope. This is one of these songs where you know exactly where its going, but you love it anyway.


oh and Snoops verse is….fine….

The Lonely Island does this alot (Turtleneck and Chain is partially a play on this). Lonely Island exuding self-importance. There are at least 2-3 (more in later years) on every album. And of all of them, I think this is the easiest winner.

There is a ton to talk about here. First, that beat is fucking AMAZING. Just a really strong way to do anything, especially start a record. Like its not even comedy good, its just good.

Next, always start a rap track with half of it being jokes about how completely fucked up and broken their respective dicks are. GRAMMY NOMINATED. They know it. They know exactly what they are doing. They got grammy nominated on stupid shit.

Jorm as the hype man is flawless. In terms of hype man rap execution, ACTUAL hype men have done worse. The energy never stops on the track and Jorm is the primary reason.

Great shit.

This may be a curveball, cause I think this is a ton of people’s least favorite Digital Short. Nah fam, you wrong. This is in that category of comedy song like Wonderboy that isn’t hilariously filled with jokes as much as it is just great.

Making a big space/Bowie-style epic song about a complete failure of Space Olympics is a fantastic idea for this type of thing.

The build up is what keeps me coming back. And as I stare death in the face/I know my sins/will take me to hell. Just for that line by itself it’s perfect.

To be honest, I kind of wished Lonely Island did more stuff like this. They kind of did in Bash Brothers, but I dont think it 100% worked. This fucking worked. Just swing harder. And keep your ass out the mini-bar.

God, I remember watching this air. I usually end up watching all of SNL before my wife gets up. And I am usually the one to tell her if SNL was even worth watching. I remember what I told her that morning “I don’t think The Lonely Island” can beat that one.

There should be a genre called weird cocaine energy. Movies. Music. Something about it fascinates me. Well, being a show that was powered by the stuff, it’s about time they do a ruin your life bit about it.

And god this is perfect. Samberg is out here chewing the damn scenery, and I am here for it. Also…and I know I’m not supposed to judge it on this criteria, but fuck it, its also the best looking digital short. I dunno if this was shot on a RED or something, but it looks FANTASTIC.

It is completely hilarious. From the weird ass chorography through Bill Hader’s amazing deadpan execution, its STILL fucking funny.

I really thought it was going to be the best thing they ever did….until….

After The Lonely Island bid farewell to the great ship SNL, they decided to cut, what I think, will be the best thing they ever did.

Lets get this out of the way first, love Between Two Ferns. Always will. And this being bookends is classic.

As far as the song itself, this is way smarter than it appears on first glance. I think one thing The Lonely Island has always been saddled with (or at least, I’ve had people say this to me) that its “bro comedy.” That its just made for bros and only bros enjoy it. While that could be a subject of its own blog, I would say plenty of their stuff is too pointed to be put in that bucket.

But I don’t have to say shit. The Lonely Island decided to tackle this head on. Alright, lets make the biggest bro song that is a direct criticism of bro culture. I’ll spell it out. All of the spring break visuals juxtaposed with gay marriages being planned/executed is stating the obvious thing: We endorse hedonism with out batting an eye, but two gay people being happy, we can’t have that.

I don’t think The Lonely Island has anything else that direct in their repertoire at all, and the rest of this album is no where NEAR this good. Speaking of things I wanted them to do, I want them to go back to THIS. They managed to do something that…at least in modern context is as close to subversive as things get today, which is to say not at all. But, beggars can’t be choosers, and I’ll take it. The Lonely Island, if you guys are reading this, do more of this.

Also, I ship Ed Norton and Jorma.

I want The Lonely Island to come out with more GREAT shit. But to me, Spring Break Anthem is their last really great thing. They have EACH gone on to do awesome shit, but I want them to bring the band back together to do something really fucking incredible.

Do it guys. The world needs it.

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