Losing another actual hero this week has just completely taken whatever wind I had left out of my sails. Positivity is really tough to maintain these days. And this is just another blow toward being positive.
Everyone reacts to this differently, and there are some of my friends that are just losing the ability to function. For real. Like, straw, camel, that whole thing.
For me? Just another call to survive.
Everytime 2020 has hit a low it finds a new low to maintain.
Last week, I said I was listening to a ton of Grateful dead. Even that optimism isn’t making a dent. It is tough to feel a light when the world is all hell all the time.
On a positive note, I am improving my skills in the gif game. Taking on requests has helped that. Getting better at putting things together, working on my compression skills.
I have a few long term goals to try to learn text tracking, 3D text, bring my gif game to appropriate meme levels. But, one week in, I am really happy with where I am.
In movie news, one of my all time favorite movies hit Netflix. I have the blu ray, but its always nice to see an old friend.
That’s how I feel about One Flew Over the Cookoo’s Nest. I had a period of traditional classics in high school. This was before I was even aware of film history textbooks or anything. I was basically going off the AFI list. Did alot of renting classics. The fucking second I saw this movie, I was hooked.
I think it scratches two itches for me:
1) I always had a fear of being committed. My great grandmother was. My grandmother was always afraid she would get committed. And I was told my entire childhood that I was crazy. That I had something wrong. Etc etc. That could be a dozen future blog posts. But, watching this…..fed into that. It does clearly lay in the sins of not understanding how to deal with people with problems squarely on those who say they are attempting to fix it. I like that.
2) I DEFINITELY know what it is like to feel trapped. In a place you don’t want to be. Sometimes you go there deliberately and can get out at anytime, but you can’t make yourself leave. I understand this. I think now more than ever.
I loved this film so much I bought the book and read it. Its still one of my favorite books.
It is highly disappointing that they actually made a spinoff TV series for the primary antagonist of our story, but I suppose that is the way of the world. Nothing is sacred.
But as I often say, it doesn’t change the original. I highly recommend watching it while its there.
On a final plague note, it’s abundantly clear that people are done doing the right thing. So we descend into chaos. For example, my son’s school is reopening, despite cases not going down at all. Luckily, we can keep doing remote.
I find it facsinating the selective importance that conservatives put on random lives. If you are old or have a co-morbidity, they have no compassion. No remorse. Let the dead die so they can go back to drinking their fucking Bud Light.
But, at least we have a system here. Our goal is running out that great infinite clock that is time. literally, letting the days go by, just to get to a possible better future.
I know i’m hitting the swish much harder than I should. I’m still exercising, but I can tell its having its toll. All I can do is hope to maintain enough structural integrity to make it to a possible better future.
…
I suppose thats everyone at this point. We do what we can.
That’s all I got for now. I hope everyone you care about is doing well, and even those you don’t.
Lets see where we are this coming week.