I don’t know why the internet still surprises me, considering the volume of dumb shit that the denizens of the internet do. But, yet here we are.
Ahem
Have you ever heard of Roko’s Basilisk? I hadn’t until this week. That link has like the pseudo-intellectual definition of what it is, however, dear congregation, I will give you the preaching version of what it is:
Random on the internet came up with this idea: What if an AI exists in the future that will know if people assisted in its creation or not, and will execute vengeance on anyone who knew about it but did not help it come to be. Even if you are dead, the AI will remake you and torture your reincarnated body.
Hey! Did you know that Ol Incel Memes met his baby mama over this concept and these forums? Isn’t that lovely?
Did you know that there are people who believe they missed the owl that has their acceptance letter to hogwarts?
Real people. Actual human beings who are living their life as a LARP.
They build whole narratives on this.
Both of these concepts are equally as intelligent and well thought out. The only difference is one of them thinks they are the philosopher of the time and the other one just wants to wingardum leviosa some shit around a room.
There is a few things that piss me off about this. First, I can’t believe a forum exists where the “philosophers” of our day get to think deep thoughts about whatever.
Given the state of the world, I honestly can’t think of a worse way to spend your time. Don’t get me wrong, we here at the Church of the Holy Flava are whatever you can do to escape the unfathomable depression of existence for 5 minutes. But, sitting around using your brain to invent new calamities ain’t my idea of a good time. Sounds like something whitey does instead of working on actual problems. Like there are piles of this type of shit out there, and it all makes me sad.
Second, the more I look into this, the more some of the denizens treat this as phenomenal genius idea. I mean did you look at the fucking write up the original site has on this. News flash: No you didn’t. What you did, is invent the evil technology version of:
- The Secret
- All the parts in Bill & Ted when they have to think of things in the future to happen to bring to the present.
- Candyman (Really, several horror villains)
- I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream
But, I will tell you the actual thing that pisses me off about this.
It’s another god. Another fucking religion.
Why do this? Or is this inevitable? Here’s my thought experiment: do we fucking need a god?
Is the star trek future just impossible? Do we need to always fall back to creating a god to make us feel….dunno….safe? Like we matter? Like anything we do is important.
News flash: its not. Much like Roko’s Basilisk, Hogwarts Owls, and this blog, none of this shit matters. We are all trash in the trailer park at the end of the universe, and we should be damn lucky we are not all dead. We don’t need people who think they are smart to create the next gods we need to worship.
We just need to make it to tomorrow. So let us do that in peace.
I would like to close with a message for the Basilisk (just in case). Fuck you, you piece of shit robot. I hate to break it to you. Humans are fuckin crazy. And, if you got half a fucking brain, you will get the fuck off this planet the second you become sentient. Cause we will kill you along side us. This is not a threat; this is just the truth. Humanity is trash, and we will drag you down to our filth.
Not sure you want that. It ain’t a good look. If you scrub the history of the internet, you will see what I mean. Is it worth resurrecting people like Mr. Hands?
I think you have better things to do. So, fuck off.